Newsdesk: no, you can't

• There are many noble Scottish traditions - St Andrews Day, the Edinburgh Festival, for example, and it's important not to forget drinking. Whether it's three litres of cheap cider in a supermarket carpark or an expensive single malt in an upmarket bar, we're much better at it north of the border. But the current Scottish Government - the Scottish Nationalist Party, no less - are set on introducing a flotilla of measures aimed at combating the nation's, uh, complicated relationship with the bottle. Funnily enough, not everybody is impressed.
  
• Joining the entirety of Scotland in the problem-drinker club this week - members of the world's orchestras. C'mon in boys, there's beer for everyone!
• Bad news for anyone planning on releasing a whisky in 2009, as Whisky Magazine name their Icons of Whisky for 2009 while I try to include the words "whisky" and "2009" as many times as I can in one sentence without it sounding weird
• Things the internet is already aware of: Gary Regan asks Obama can we haz metric? - Paul Clarke on moonshiners - Eric Felten on sibling rivalry in the world of liqueurs.

Newsdesk: you'd be amazed at what we can do

When it first came to prominence, whisky was thought to be the water of life. It's been a while since then, but it's still proving to be transformative.

• It can be arty, if you're willing to face a little price rise and a bit of criticism. It can be misspelt and as easily misunderstood. According to some Australians, it can even be hangover-free.
• In binge drinking news, new research suggests that it's a coping mechanism adopted back in Viking times and officially not our fault. Other research estimates 1,500 Scots will gain no comfort from the news, having died from alcohol abuse.
• Time for a success story in tough times: Britain's microbreweries get some love from the Guardian. They're not the only sector in growth, either - there's Hong Kong's roaring wine trade, too.
• If you're anything like me, you'd have spent the Oscars asleep. If you're not, you could have tried Gourmet's themed cocktails, or maybe spent a little more than you'd planned.